A flower, Just a flower
With some petals
I do not count them though,
I just pick them off one by one
He loves me
He loves me not
He loves me
He loves me not
He loves me
Finally the last petal is next
What will it be?
My loves make
Or
Heart break
I close my eyes
And finish the pattern
"He loves me not"
My heart sinks
I feel tears in my eyes
I cannot hold them back
Silently I cry
Then I realize
A flower just a flower
Just a silly flower
But in the halls
I am proven wrong
 And my heart is crushed
With just one word
"No"
A flower just a flower
With no more petals
          No more hope...
                                     No more love...
                                                     No more life...

Rusted shut
 When left out in the rain.
You,
Always saw into the eyes of so called innocence No, I was the one called insane You never knew that they were the evil eyes You, The little girl that never saw clearly Never saw the truth behind all the sin and lies Please, Do not leave me be Please, Come closer Please, Speak to me Let my light be cast upon you For only then, Will the scales from your eyes But, Even when rejecticted No matter what they say,  Even if they knew Still, I would always stand up for you.
For,
I Thought it was a given,
To care for your friends
To help your friends
To find them in the dark
And bring a candle with you
 To guide them back to the heart
But,
 I was wrong
Why should I care?
When you drown,
I will just stare
And give the evil grin that the world would know as sin.
I know now that love is blind,
The heart is black,
And I'll leave you behind.

Nothing I do is ever good enough.
I succeed but you never notice,
All you do is come running to find mistakes.
You make me feel like less than nothing.
How is it that I am always
Afraid and angry and trapped when I'm with you?
You're always right, I'm always wrong.
I feel like I'm playing a game I can't win, I am a pawn controlled by you.
Humiliated, degraded, broken.
I let the emotions pile up
Like bricks in a wall,
Until I can't see out
And no one else can see in.
People have no idea what goes on,
I try to hold my composure.
With all this eating me away inside,
I almost feel like shutting down.
But thanks for leaving me with the memory Of the birthday you forgot.
How you could never acknowledge your carelessness, I simply don't understand.
Crying myself to sleep that night,
Without a phone call or a text.
But I guess you'll never learn
Because you turned right back around and did it again, But this time I wasn't the victim.
So go ahead and keep living your life
The way you always have,
And I'll just sit here
Trying to make sense of everything you've done to me.
And you know what the sad part is?
I let you do this to me,
I allow you to have total power over me.
You may think you have weakened me,
But you have only made me stronger.
I know I'm not perfect,
And I don't ever plan to be.
I've had enough of your games,
I am done trying to impress you.
I will not let you tear me apart anymore.
You don't realize what you've done
Until you've hurt the ones you supposedly love.
But even then you have no clue.
And you wonder why I'm drifting away from you?
Because of you my world is shattered,
And now I have to pick up all the pieces And put it back together the best way that I can So I can carry on with what society calls a "normal" life.
What is normal anyway?
Is there such a thing?
Or have I been living in some sort of fantasy world?
Have I been wishing for something that doesn't even exist?
Whether it's real or not,
I will continue to wait for this "normal"
Because I'm sure it's a much better place than where I'm at.

A hawk flies ever so free
Under the wing of its protector.
Soaring high above the clouds,
Nothing holding it back.
The pure and innocent creature continues To grow and to change.
This bird will soon be captured and controlled With the attempt to preserve its innocence.
But nothing or no one is meant to stay the same.
Taken into captivity and caged away
With clipped wings.
It can't go anywhere, do anything.
Always feeling like less than nothing
With the cruel words it somehow does not understand.
But why does it continue to feed out of the hand That has caused it harm?
The hawk is trapped with no choice
But to wait.
And wait.
Until the time comes when
I have broken free from that cage
And am free to fly.

ive become like dust in the feild
scattered in the wind
and all whats left of me
is what you used to see.
let me shatterand fly away
in the wind
like tiny sparks of light
riding of the back of stars
cause ive died tonight
becoming like dust in the feild
scattered in the wind
and all thats left of me
is what you choose to see
.what you choose to see
ill slip away
and whisper in your ear
that i was never really here
allways partially gone
i was dead before this began.
dead before this began
all these thoughts in my head
telling me to become like the dust
scattered in the windthe wind
and all these tears are beneth my skin
leaking leaking pouring threw
and ill hold these tears in
if it means that i get to save you
dust in the wind
im like the stars above
my light shines on
but im long gone
long gone
like dust in the wind

I look to the green jungle outside my house, the one I'd known almost all my life. Its secrets I once knew were long gone; as were my playful days. I venture towards it once again, to see black tar and ugly white signs. Alas, curiosity betrays me. So I walk.

I hear the familiar sound of Crickets as I travel along the black path, across fields were I knew every hole and every bump. I search desperately for anything familiar to see, and finally I spy my weeping Willow tree. Lured on by memory's bait; so I walk.

I hear the dogs bark in their yards, and see the sunflowers shine by the creek. I turn the corner and see a bridge, without rails; crossing over stagnant water. Its beauty and wretchedness' touches my heart as I search for another path to take. So I walk.

Passing by the still bridge I feel the breeze caress my back, and know that I am loved. I glance up and see the late sun filter through the green woods, not yet touched by fall. So I walk.

Two trees bend together and between their trunks a spider rests. His web spun intricately between the two trunks, waiting for dinner and the night. I know that there is still life here and with it hope. So I walk.

Glancing around I see dead trees, piled up mercilessly by the road, and quickly walk on. Beyond it I see a tiny stream, and a tiny bridge. As I step onto the bridge and glance over the rail I see cool clear inviting water. So I walk.

I leave the bridge, but not the stream; casting my sandals aside I wade into the refreshing water, not caring if anyone sees. When I feel relaxed I leave the stream, but only to go wet and barefoot. So I walk.

I look up at the sun and know my time is waning. I scamper along the unfamiliar path, only to come to the still bridge again. Looking across it to my path home, I walk steadily across it. As I walk I hear the frogs jump into the water, and see the translucent wings of dragonflies' and know that peace is here. So I walk.

As I come to the home stretch of my journey, I find myself looking, ridiculously, for any sign of an old plank I'd thrown across the creek as a child. Just as I am ready to give up, deep off the path, in the green brush, I spy the splintered remains of my old plank. Content in my heart, I leave an old and new place. So I walk.

So cautious
I'm sitting here
On eggshells,
And if I break one
I'm through
Done
Busted back
To ninth grade
Where I belong
Because
I've reached
Too far.

So sue me
Then forgive me, please.
Won't you?
All I ever wanted
Was to be
Without being me
But you won't allow it
Will you, honey?
It's okay-
No, it is.
I do understand
Even if you don't want me to.

Don't keep me
Here in miniature.
It's rather rough
Being stuck in your pocket.
Look at me
Look before I call your name
Look at what I've made
A picture painted for you to see.
Go take "Interpretation of Art"
Maybe then you'll understand it.

Above all,
Read my mind
Don't make me show you
How wretched I can be.
Just read this poem
Over my shoulder,
And don't ask for an interpretation.

These days just waste away,
and you still don't have
anything to say.
I wait until you are
nowhere in sight
to show the real me.
You've got me locked up tight,
please just set me free.
What is wrong with me?
There has to be something,
because of all this pain that you bring.
I just want to sing,
sing a song of pretty words
and a melody.
I want It all to be
dedicated to glee.
I want to stand tall,
But you pull be down.
Just as my smile,
fading into a frown.
One day you will break,
trust me it is true
and it is all because
of you

Dawn breaks above the trees,
oranges, yellows, reds, and blues.
A canvas made of sky.
And the painter,
the one I can not see.
The artist who has placed it there,
as just a minor gift of beauty.

The birds begin chirping,
a song no human could ever understand.
The wind and the leaves,
all move perfectly to the rhythum.
And the composer,
the one who made them all,
smiles as he conducts to life all of his creation.

Every waking of the sun,
it's always and never the same.
it's the art,
it's the music,
it's the simple miracle of a new day.

I could try and conceal the things that are real,but that would be deceptive you see,

Some honesty can make one feel clean. And set you free from the sigh deep within.

When you tell it sometimes you may cry,but you can rejoice in your soul at night. No more disappointment or wassted time.

Once you let the lies go your free to live and fight with great confidence another day, because you know your not housing sin.

So please by all means let the truth begin,and never end. In fact it should be your very best friend.

the sun is burning, the heat is sweltering, yet I see no sign of cicadas lurking.

Just walking down the street will make you overheat, and you'll probably be able to fry an egg on the asphalt street.

where is the lemonade, the ice cream and the pops, put them in the fridge,then sit back and enjoy the lot.

I wouldn't on a dare, walk barefoot all around, lawn mowers and cars, a summer day is full of sound.

When all the world was set aflame
And fire joined the sky and ground,
No one quite knew who to blame;
Who had cast the angels down?
Who from heaven sent away
Those great protectors in their might,
Took their ivory wings away,
And drove them off into the night?
With burning thoughts and scorching woes, They gathered in the growing dark, The fallen angels and their foes; On each the other left their mark.
"Bow down, archangels! Now they come,
The rebels to reclaim their throne!
They will defeat you one by one,
Divide you till you stand alone!"
They met on Origen's lost grave,
He who wrote of their grim fate.
Between the angels battle raged;
They remembered him too late.
Stars swept up and turned to dust,
Fell down from the bloody sky;
The creatures he so surely loved -
He sadly passed them by.
The silver stardust settled down
When at last the battle ceased;
Fallen angels on the ground -
Their brethren foes deceased.
A beautiful mystery to unravel;
One band gone and cold as stone,
Lying fallen on the gravel;
And in the dark one stands alone.

You know what happens after you smile?
Eventually you start to frown
"I'm sure she hurt you"
But she's still living two doors down

So what do you think happens
When you both start to scowl
You get in a fight one night
So he walks next door in just a towel

And if you see sad brown eyes
It's because you're not her
If he says he's never told lies
Then I would like to refer

You to the last line
Where you said your love's forever
What are you.eleven?
Cause that playground love's clever

But I thought it was interesting
For you to say he doesn't have a heart
Right there in line 10
And then in line 11 you're "love" starts

So it's 3 months now
Since you wrote that in September
I bet you guys are broken up
And I bet you don't even remember

The smile you have on
Biggest one I've ever seen
Finally your happy
this day I wouldn't believe
you are always sad
just like dark cloudy skies
your eyes are of sadness
that never told lies
she really hurt you
she took your heart too
you didn't deserve that
and I know that is the truth
but here you are smiling
I ask you why
you told me you love me
and it was no lie
I am now really happy
I have loved you for so long
though I thought this day would never come now I see I was wrong and this is no dream Now I'm smiling too this is really happening Now I know that the love that we share would never fade away the love will be forever and always.

i was nearing 17 when i met the girl who saw my dreams i was holding everyone until i saw her the very one when i was 17 we were dodging in the sun to believe you could be the one i was laughing to much fun and drawing up our very guns back when we were 17 i was walking not to run to be the one who wouldnt ruin all the fun i always held on to the sun for he was the very one who never led to one ill step into you your eyes and punch out any guy my hands are inside your heart , hoping not to hide the hours turn to dust and dust turns to gust but one more for the  sun if i cant hold on , would you let me go?
But these pictures pealing indeed
why wont only let me be?
i always remember
we were only 17

I am a lady,
A twelve years old.
I like to write,
And do some art.

I am a lady,
A pro-life lady.
A Christian girl,
If I may say.

I am a lady,
A pretty lady.
Thank you,
For listening!!

Alone she walks, alone she speaks,
alone in this dark world she will sleep, forced to be sombody new each day, Alone she's forced to grow up  soon some day, Not knowing who her family is, Alone she eats at the table again.

Quiet castle,
burning candles,
dresses' tassels,
wooden mantles.

Glowing fire,
slicing cold,
battle dire,
sire bold.

Goodbye kisses,
fond farewells,
hopeful wishes,
chiming bells.

Tear-stained cheeks,
clacking armor,
spirits meek,
parting charmer.

Silent halls,
doleful ladies,
echoing walls,
fearing Hades.

Breathless waiting,
endless tears,
memories fading,
countless prayers.

Misty hills,
galloping horses,
tingling chills,
returning forces.

Silver night,
shining bright,
silver knight,
lover's plight.

A tear rolls down her cheek
She is too afraid to speak and now has to deal with the consquences It's too late to turn back now The mistake has been made, the gate of trust now gone

Scared and alone for the very first time It must be hard to tell someone, torn between if she should or not Not sure if they would understand She doesn't need someone to judge her just someone who is there for her

Nine months of pain
All because of that night where a mistake was gained Now, in her arms lays a little baby I never once thought what it was like From a teenage mother's point of view

such a strong word
but doesn't have much of a meaning anymore I ask myself everyday why there is such a word Then I remember everything has a pair

God gave us two hands
Two legs to stand on the ground
Two eyes to see the world around us
But only one heart to beat
Why did he do this to us
Because he put the other out in the world for us to find

Many times I thought I have found love
Only to find it wasn't real
Now I stand here to tell you I feel I have now I think it is real, but only time will tell I have fell in and out of love many times I can tell you this love is here to stay

I believe love does exist in our world
You just have to serach for it
It hides in places you wouldn't expect
You just have to have open eyes
Don't listen to the liesof those who don't care They are the ones who don't have their eyes open Love is a word with tons of meanings You just have to find one that suits you

As I sit here in class,
 I observe my friends
 And look forward to the year
 Coming to an end.
 It's gonna be sad
 To say good- bye.
 I'll miss everyone.
 I know I will cry.
 I remember the day
 When I came back
 To be with my friends
 And get on the right track.
 We had so many moments;
 Some bad, most great.
 I'll always remember the love
 And erase the hate.
 I don't wanna say good- bye
 To all my friends.
 I don't want this year
 To come to an end.

Four letters
Not always pronounced the same
Not always with the same meaning
Sometimes said before a name

Oh the power they hold
When combined in such a way
Anxiety happiness depression
Caused by these four letters you could say

It's meant to be after friendship
But before you pop the question
Except even I've known times
When that's not a rule but a suggestion

Because people get married
For reasons other than this
And people fall for strangers
that they tried to talk to, but missed

And some people use it wrong
Only because they don't know what it means While others sometimes say it Just to get the "physical things"
 
But when it's real
It can change meanings
Good morning becomes farewell
Goodnight becomes a greeting

Friendships becomes more
Or are destroyed in the words pursuit
A third wheel becomes the forth
Or else it gets the boot

Men become monsters
And would rather begin a war
Than loose this newfound thing
They know to be more precious than before

Its only four letters
And I bet you guessed it at the start
L.O.V.E.
Holds a place in all our hearts

"Thursday your dad is going into surgery."
I remember the words from that night.
I remember the previous burdens...crashing down.
I remember seeing the funny me in my mind Stopping and jumping off the side of my happy Mountain.
I remember the ocean of tears and the shower of Despair that sank deep into my soul.
I remember my mind racing, thinking about Horrible scenarios that could occur from the S-word.
I would imagine this as an episode of House, Cut open for all the viewers to see No NO NO!
I hate remembering.
I want to forget and erase.
But I can't...its into my mind like an ugly Tattoo.

1)"i have everything! beauty, brains, power, accomplishments, I am seen! I gasp... it was only a dream."

2)"I awoke one night with a feeling of fright... eyes wide teeth clenched, i remember my nightmare.. but recall nothing.. and nothing is what i fear."

3)"im shaking from enragment... craving to stab it out of me. It turns my eyes red and my skin a pale as paper. i crumble to the ground and my head begins to pound. My tears soon collide with the cold ground. The feeling of content will never be found."

4)"I lie crying on the bathroom floor. Praying that they dont open the door. I can not take this anymore. they say i am not worthy. This sends me over the edge falling into a pool of anger and regret. My bones being to break with the pressure... My head goes under.. i am gone."

5)"i am drowning out the words i hear at school. I can sometimes feel myself drool. My attention is short. I need to get out! But my only choice is to sit here in my desk and pout.. for there is no way out."

I remember his
Shirt unbuttoned low.
A metal bracelet tied around his wrist.
Burnt pizzas balanced on his arms.
He smelled like he just took a shower.
I had just walked the Vatican,
I needed a shower.
While I looked nasty,
He was an Italian god dressed with a
Simple apron and loose white shirt.
I remembered it as love at first sight.
I remember his skin basking in the sun's rays.
I remember the way he swayed as he walked, The way he spoke Italian.
I think he was 15 or 16,
But there is no number on love to me.
He smiled when he served the pizza.
I didn't even know his name,
But something in his eyes...something shone.
Then and there it happened.
I remember this as my first time I fell
In love with a random stranger.

Severing ties, means I'm tired of lies.
And I dont even want to try,nor justify.
So this has to be Goodbye.
Forgetting the past,that's a luxury
that never last.
Enduring the knowledge, understanding the pain,is not an easy gain.
But I must keep insight what's underneath there.
To place myself in the wisdom from it all. To know what's been done,does not dictate what shall be. Letting go of the past is never easy,God must do it through me. And only in Him can I abstain, from taking those trips down memory lane.
Letting go of the past is a luxury that never last. Letting go of the past is not forgetting:
but learning from the memories.And allowing Ha"Shem to enrich me,in strength in Mind,Spirit,and soul.

What is a life if not lived for another, What is a friend if he's not the color of a brother?

What is a game if not played to win,
And what is sex if it conceives no sin?

What's in the slums when there's no hope, What gives us the high if it's not the dope?

What heals the wounds that can't be seen, Well what is a king without a queen?

What gets us through those old winter nights, And would we watch it if not for the fright?
Could it be seen without the light,
And could it be won without a fight?

Could we live if no one died,
Who would seek if no one hides?

Who's our friend and who's our foe,
Are we different or the same John Doe

Is there anything to loose or anything to gain, What do you own except for your name?

No one can answer these questions for you Because the answer to life is in what you do.

Whisper,
In my,
Ear,
The lies,
You tell,
Don't let,
Me know,
What the,
Mind,
Truthfully,
Says,
I'm lost,
 In your,
Words,
You say,
Are true,
The feelings,
In my,
Heart,
Blinded by,
You're lying,
Your say,
Three words,
Count to ten,
And make it all better,
Every time,
You're gone,
I know,
You're,
Secret,
I don't want to believe,
What,
I see,
In your eyes,
The truth.

What's up with these little poems
That don't want to rhyme
That just talk on how hard life is
And how there's not enough time

There's too many of them
They fill our lives with more stress
They don't change how we feel
And they don't make our pain any less

They're just words picked out of the jar And randomly spewed back onto the page No meaning behind them No loyalty with age

But we read them anyway
Trying to subtract their meaning
Multiplying it by our own lives
So they'll add to the healing

But they divide our true character
And this isn't even school
There's no book to use
And our only real tool

Is our heads and ourselves
And our brains and our hearts
To live how we want to live
And to be true from the start

So although it's a little mushy
And not entirely "hood'
Question everything.
Retain what is good

Decide what life is yourself
Don't mooch off other people
I'm not saying give up poetry
I'm not even saying be equal

I'm not saying always be strong
I'm not saying mix pence
And I'm not even saying
You have to believe this makes sense

But don't soak up every little poem
That you happen to see
Because somewhere writing another one
Is someone exactly like me

Think of me when you're in HER arms.
Think of me when you're laying in her bed and Realizing how unhappy you are.

Think of me when she demands
so much more than what you can give her.
Remember me when she tugs and tears at your heart And bleeds you until you're left in a puddle Of your own blood.

Think of me when you find out
She's cheating on you behind your back.
Think of me when you beat up the man
That took your place in her heart.

Think of me when she leaves.
Think of me when you realize she's actually betrayed you...
Like I would have never done.

Remember me when you realize that you could've Done so much better.
And that you HAVE done better
Think of me when you realize
That that "better" was me.

Think of me when you see me in the cafe
Sitting with my man
Kissing him
Holding him
Loving him
Like I used to love you.

Think of me as that tear slips down your cheek And the cold freezes it half way down its journey.
Think of me as you realize you no longer have me.
Think of me when you walk into that weapon-shop.

When you pay for that gun...

When you buy the bullets...

Think of me when you load that gun...

Think of me when you pull the trigger.

tears seem to be my only sweet lullabies, bringing me sleep every night.

time seems to be my only pain relief,
the only thing to fight heart ache.

losing my grip seems to be my only salvation, showing me, my true self.

rambling and stammering seems to be my only communication, slowly letting out what i have to say.

loneliness seems to be my only best friend, without the others, i grow a little stronger.

losing and wanting to give up seem to be my only pick me ups, giving me reasons to get back up.

thank god for these little things,
they seem to make me sane.

The things I feel around you
I've never felt around anybody else
Like I want to rip out my heart
And put it in a jar on the shelf

Or like I wanna keep my heart
And hold on to this feeling
I can't figure out which one
And so I can't begin the heeling

Yes I liked you
But I know I loved "us"
And yes we both had
The same feeling of trust

But what we didn't have
Was "nothing but happy times"
And the pain that I felt
Fails to be expressed in this rhyme

So we flared and faded
Like the setting summer sun
Then got back together
As if the battle we won

But we fell back apart
And both seemed too mad
But what I want most of all now
Is exactly what we had

So how do I get it back
That understanding we shared
Why is it that when I'm around
I'm suppose to act as if I don't care

The one thing I learned
Is that teens don't last forever
So the love I try to leave
But the memories I treasure

An empty notebook, waiting to be filled; A small inspiration.
 Kids laughing, having a good time;
A small inspiration.
 The sun setting upon my face;
A small inspiration.
 A bird hatching out of it's egg;
A small inspiration.
 Snow falling, softly on the ground;
A small inspiration.
 A pebble skipping across the pond;
A small inspiration.
 Flowers blooming, petals shades of pink; A small inspiration.
 Fire crackling, creating a warm glow;
A small inspiration.
 A star shooting across the dark night sky; A small inspiration.
 Small inspirations are all around us; I have mine, go find yours today!

A Shalom flow of word's do I speak.
Not my words, but Yeshua..His Ru Ha Chodesh..
the Spirit speaks through me. And the Shalom abounds endlessly. He is Shalom what we all need.Just to live our daily lives,for their are those who rise up with strife.My Shalom from love..thats his name too.He's all I need to make it through,the storms in life.Adonai gives me Shalom, his special gift.He gives it liberally to all who believe.
A peaceful mind gives focus to gain.HASHEM's wisdom and instruction so we can sustain. Although at times we are mentally distracted by many cares.If we only remember to call on His name YESHUA is always ready to guide my way through the rain.

I'm sorry for all I've never done, and all I'll never do

Because I live my life for me, not for you

I will live up to my expectations alone

And it's not my fault if you can't grasp that

I wanted to make you happy

But sometimes that's just not enough

Go on and ignore me

And I'll go on my way, doing what I do

I didn't live up to your expectations

Because I am a simple human

My mistakes must be my own

And I will learn from my past

I won't be satisfied with someone else's truths

But I will find my own, someday

And if you don't like that, just look the other way

No one asked you to pay attention anyway

I can bearly see past the

Dirt grime and time

That has made this it's resting place

Though probably not it's last

For curious hands like mine

Will come and brush it off just to see inside

Then when their time is up and their whim is gone, so are they

And everything is left to find it's place again

Could this Rainbow be my savior?

Or the rocky crag be my down fall

The Benevolent side of me wants to believe

But all isn't well

And dangerous thoughts are conceived

The Rainbow with the Pot o gold at the end

Can sometimes be empty
Some are fooled by the rainbows beautiful bend

Do I want to enter the mindset of this beautiful scene?

Light on the doves is what makes them white

Are they really pure?

Or just a scientific fluke

Some thoughts so sick

I feel like I'm going to puke

Could this rainbow be my savior?

No this rainbow is not favored

everytime i look at u,
u make me smile cause u stare at me to,
why you scared to be with me,
we mess around but no one can see,
would there ever be us together,
because all i can think about is us for ever, how do i know if you even like me, you wont even let me know if we are ment to be, is love a name and sex game, so when it comes to me and you, you forget the name and play the game

I'm sorry for all I've never done, and all I'll never do

Because I live my life for me, not for you

I will live up to my expectations alone

And it's not my fault if you can't grasp that

I wanted to make you happy

But sometimes that's just not enough

Go on and ignore me

And I'll go on my way, doing what I do

I didn't live up to your expectations

Because I am a simple human

My mistakes must be my own

And I will learn from my past

I won't be satisfied with someone else's truths

But I will find my own, someday

And if you don't like that, just look the other way

No one asked you to pay attention anyway

She stands alone
all skin and bone.

They told you look fat
you'll fit into that.

The size double zero jean
girls can be mean.

This gives her stress
if only she didn't say yes.

In her mind it says hunger hurts
yet starving works.

They tell her eat this
you'll get a kiss.

She listens to way they say
now her body is on it's way to decay.

She's in the ground
where she hears no sound.

She stopped eating
soon her heart stopped beating.

Look at what we've done
it was only for fun.

Telling her what do
we didn't have a clue.

That she trusted our choices
she listened to all our voices.

I wish it didn't happen to her
I must concur.

That I actually liked her as a friend
in the end.

The cost was her death
good bye Beth.

Look in my eyes and what do you see
Look in my eyes and who do you see?
Do you see me? a girl full of hopes
and dreams. Dancing in the stream
that is life. Spinning in circles
feeling as a bird. Look in my eyes
and what do do you? Do you see the light from God that shelters my soul,so that only he may be in control.Look in my eyes and what do you see? do you see the joy tide that is just about to rise.

I watch her walk into the church,
She has dark shadows under her eyes,
Looking as if she has not slept in weeks,
Her eyes are puffy red,
Her clothes are ruffled,
In the last week she has walked in every day,
Same time,
And sat in the same place,
In the last row,
I wonder why,
She looks this way,
And why she is here,
And why she has caught my attention,
When others like her as walked in,
In same condition, As her,
She is another stranger,
I could walk by on the street,
I am staring at her,
She catches me staring,
We hold the stare for along time,
Her eyes have so many emotions,
I brake the hold on the stare,
It frightened me,
Her piercing stare,
But she must of thought I knew,
Something,
Because she never walked in again,
After that,
So she was another stranger,
That somehow caught my attention,
In this strange church,
In this frightening world of ours.

Our lives,
We can say are horrible,
Say that no one cares,
Talk like no one is listing,
Cry like there are no tears,
Live like there is a tomorrow,
Think without any thoughts,
But the truth about life is,
Its not horrible,
People did care,
When you talk someone was listening,
When you cry there was tears,
Confusion with reality.

I wake in the morning,
and out of bed rise,
to see the sun start to color the skies.
 
Out in the pasture,
the horses start to neigh.
They are telling me to come
and bring them their hay.
 
The birds are all singing,
the rooster has crowed.
I listen to them while
I carry my load.
 
The foals frolic 'round me,
the mares with heads high,
the stallion snorts at a buzzing bee,
his tail swishes a passing fly.
 
The morning has started,
the sun is in the sky,
and now I must say,
"So long, goodbye."

A single apple on a tree

I wonder if it’s for me

A single point of light

In a landscape of night

A blood red rose

In a valley of snow

A single apple on a tree

He turns to face me

"A little late for apples my dear”

The apple falls like a tear

Some people guess.
That the way you dress.

Is who you are.
They only look that far.

They don't care.
They'll stop and stare.

They are rad.
Diffrent is bad.

So what if your not.
Their version of hot.

Beauty's only skin deep.
Some are taking the leap.

They don't feel sad.
They still think they're rad.

They're still the in crowd.
They still talk loud.

They've caused many deaths.
So many who can no longer take breaths.

I hope that one day.
They see an error in their way.

Thanks for messing me up
Thanks for tearing me down
Thanks for screwing me up
And taking me around

Thanks for messing this up
Thanks for letting me in.
And making me talk and seep in sin

Thanks for breaking me apart
Thanks for ripping this heart
Thanks for everything you’ve done
Because now you’ve won

I don’t understand
I don’t wanna know
I need God not you to show. Me. The way.
I need help
I need tears
I need some way to let out all this fear.
I need to run.
I need someone.
To get a gun.

I want to get out
I want to run away
All of this matter is making me say

Take me away
Take me away
From this place
Take me away
Take me away

With You I’ll forever stay.
Take to me to You.
And Your Son.
Take me away from all of this love.
Come what may….

I have to say:
I just want you to take me away.

Hidden in darkness
Writhing in fear
Splattering pain just comes nearer

To my heart
To my head
And my brain
I just can’t take this again

I need Your guidance
I need the light
I need to your help

Meaningfully
Desperately
Screaming
For you.

I’m crying for you Lord.

I walk into a room,
I hold my breathe,
I take my next step,
Eyes stare,
Smiles fade,
Love vanishes,
I stare ahead,
The piercing sounds of the whispers,
The pointing fingers,
Darkness all around,
A spotlight on me,
My biggest fear alive,
But all of sudden,
Someone touches my hand,
It whispers my name,
I turn slowly,
I begin,
My mind goes blank,
I see him there,
His eyes tell me everything
Is going to be okay,

a heart is not a plaything
a heart is not a toy
but if you want it broken
give it to a boy

D. r. i. f. t. i.n.g. through the wind
Just swirling in a circle
Everything seems alright
Echoeing off beams of light

Softly, gracefully, becoming

n-o-t-h-i-n-g.
gently, winding down to sleep
I cry inside the deep ocean of my heart
Always there
Now I need to be shy to
Show it,
just a shoulder to cry on

but I can’t reveal what I feel

in an audience of revelers
if only you would hold me once

again
I could know something----
And cry
Settling in the coves of a once unknown mind….
Just be
Just there
Just for
Just me
Please?
I’m pulled to you but we’re torn apart
I wish I could share
But I shake in the rejection of fears

If you could be there for just a moment
As my teardrop
ripples on the river……
the maybe? Everything would be

okay

A time of joy
Of song
Of laughter and smiles
Of happiness and content
Till an eagle
A glimmering sage
Says no more
O’ little mocking birds
Time to change
No secret glances
Nor silent laughs
For that is the devils way
Time to repent
And sing no more
The eagle says
stay at your perch
Dear mockingbirds
Silent for the rest of your days

Blue,
        
          Peaceful,
                     
                        Unpredictable,
 
                                           Stormy,
 
                                                    A throbbing pulse,
 
                                                                               A home,
 
                                                                   Waves that kiss
 
                                                                      the sky,
 
                                                          A living thing,
 
                                                  A beautiful thing,
 
                                           A place like no other,
 
                                       It touches all countries,
 
                                      It connects all lands,
 
                                  It washes over the sands,
 
                            The wonderful, beautiful Oceans.

Once you knew me

Once you told me

I was your friend

Now it’s cackling

Deep in pits

Instead of talking to me

You stray behind me

Trying to stab me

Deep within

Hissing flames

Burn in your stagnant soul

Agony and pain will overcome

You later on

Actions speak

Louder

Shouting shouting

I’ve lost control

Words burn bitter

Steaming steaming

You will make me pay for you

I know He’s there to save me

help me through this time

of hate and harassment

while you

have no one

guiding your way

you’re led by chemicals

I’m led by Him

He will help me through

I can forgive

But you can’t forget

And I will just ignore

And while you snore

Pitifully falling

Into space

I sleep soundly

With Him by my side

Guiding me through this time.

He is with me, I can feel his presence by my side.

Pure and godly

Ethereal and clean

He’s not yours to take

You can fill me up

You can bring me down

But you can’t remove Him from me

For he is God, the Almighty

And he will never back down

Majestic, strong

And ever-loving

I wish for you

To change your ways

And accept Him

Realize what you’ll gain

But for now

I sit and ignore

Smiling at your game

Because he is with me

Standing there

By my side forevermore

Burning

Falling

Swiping

Meandering

Subconscious

Always about you

Wanting

Desiring

Hoping

Praying

For you

More than

Respect

More than friendship

More than desire

: love

The slowest form of suicide

Blood dripping

Softly on a white pillow

Downy and blank

Stained

By the thought

Of you

And me

Endlessly

Red

And wrong

Forgive me for the wrong I’ve done and that I will do

Forgive me for all the unbelievable hatred things I’ve said to you

Forgive me for wishing you’d die and go straight to hell

Forgive me for wishing you lived in an air tight cell

Forgive me for leading you down the wrong path

Forgive me for beating you, and doing it as a craft

Forgive me for saying you were useless in life

Forgive me for getting so angry I picked up the knife

Forgive me for hurting you, I know it was wrong

And that’s why I’m leaving you but I couldn’t take this poem along

I want you to keep to it and understand the meaning

I want you to know I’m not trying to be deceiving

But before this poem is over I want you to remember one thing

And please, do remember this, because it will explain a lot of things

The reason I showed hatred towards you, is not because I’m that kind of person

But because I loved that you were once in my life and that I could once call you my wife

I didn’t want to lose you, and if I ever did, I would become very sad

So I did those horrible things to you because I also got mad

But look where I am now,

Leaving the love of my life, leaving the woman who I once called wife

But I don’t deserve all the sympathy, I think you do

So before my poem is over and before your life is through

I need you to promise me one thing, that you will forgive me, because deep down in your heart,

You know it’s the right thing to do

So please, Forgive Me

It was the lies my friend told me
Which made tears build up in my eyes
I was blinded by fake friendship
And it is now, my friend who I despise.
It was the lie my friend told me
She told me she would never be troubled Then she cursed at me in front of everyone at school That was when my anger doubled It was the lie my friend told me The deception, the disgrace She told me she would always be truthful I will never forget the fake promise she made It was the lie my friend told me She said she'll never turn her back on me It was the last time I talked to her again

The Love I have for you is strong,
 
But, dearly we may Not go on,
 
It hurts so much to see you go,
 
But, you just left an hour ago,
 
I pray for you,
 
You pray for me,
 
Thats called a love store,

a wisper in my ear
what i love to hear,
you say that you love me ,
and you want to keep me near.
 
Tell me if you mean it,
disolve my worst fears
show me that you'll be here,
for many many years
 
A wisper in my ear,
tells me no fear,
you hold my hand,
to make me stand.
 
A wisper in my ear
shows me i was wrong
i was afraid and tried to run away.
i have tried to run from many other things,
but it is not that i need to run away,
it's that i need to stay.

With every slap and every curse
i rearange another verse
 
with every blow to the head
I forget those words I once said
 
Those simple words no longer inside
because i do not love,
I hate with pride
 
A hate burning so deep inside
wondering if our worlds colide
 
A simple world in the unknown
I thought i buried so long ago
 
I dont want to return again
because sometimes it feels
more like a sin

Nine years ago you wased away,
and still to this day i haven't said your name
 
I was told you dont want me
i dont know if it's true
but heres a few words that i would say to you
 
i would tell you i'm sorry for what i did wrong,
and for nine years i have tried to be strong
 
i'v been alone for all this time
nine times out of ten you'd never see me cry,
but every now and then i'd have to wipe an eye
 
a sad little girl with a world unknown
you left so helpless, so she turned to stone
 
she wouldnt be hurt like she was hurt before
if she didn't love or laugh anymore
 
and then one day as you came back
what do you know she started to laugh
 
the stone in turn, returned to gold
because the love you gave her
was now her own!

in midnight,
in darkness,
i love you so,
you make me happy from dawn to day,
you make me cry when your gone away,
even though you will be back some day,
i love you so
i know you will be there through thick and thin,
i know you will love me if i do a sin,
i care and love and forgive through andthrough,
i love you so.
 
I want to donate this to my dad he is my life.

I know you carry a burden.
But why sit and Sigh??
Your cares in life have been many,
I cant tell by the look in your eye.
 
Now the road of life you have traveled
Your work you have tried to enjoy,
And your pleasures one cannot destroy.
 
So, look to the future for pleasure
The world holds plenty for all.
Your share should be abundant
Your harvest will be your great call.
 
So throw aside all of your burdens
Give a laugh instead of a sigh
And I know you will be happy.
I can tell by the look in your EYE.
 
 
* This poem was dedicated to a very special person!!!
Her name was Ethel Hubert and she was my Great Grandmother and she deserves the honor in this POEM...................

That word had grown so real to me
They couldn’t see what I had inside
They just laughed as I ran to hide
Now I’m laughed at day by day
And I know it doesn’t help to run away
Now I’m visible for all to see
And I have friends who love me for me

What happened to my future
So warm and bright
Now all I see is darkness
Which replaced my wonderful light
My past haunts me
My years of terror and fright
I dwell on the past
Instead of my future once so bright
Will it e’er stop
Should I push away
All the pain that makes me stronger today
Is this part of a quest which will lead me to
The bright future that I once knew
For now I will just sit on the floor or lay
And let out the tears I’ve held back today
When I’m in my room safe and warm
Happily shielded from harm
And harsh words from my fellow students
As well as my disappointed parents
I can’t escape will I e’er find
A safe haven and friends warm and kind
But for now I’ll dwell on the past
Until I reach my bright future at last

I’ll wait for thee
Till the moon doth shine
At the dawn of early morn
And the sun doth rise at dusk
And a song is not but words
And the beat of my heart
The rhythm of my beating heart
Dost stop in its tracks
Then till it doth beat again
I then my love shall see at last
So I’ll wait for thee
Till the moon doth shine
At the dawn of early morn
And the sun doth rise in heaven
For I, my love, shall be waiting there

There once was a girl
Who didn’t know what to do
She had so many problems
She was always blue
Nowhere to go
No place to hide
To her friends
She’s at least once lied
Who knows what is
Beneath her past
This mystery will
Longest last
She’s so lucky
Yet she’s miserable
Her broken heart’s
Caused her so much trouble
She tells me
I’m the only one
Who can shine the light
From her big sun
She thinks and knows
I can stop her pain
I’m an angel from heaven and I feel
Her love’s red stain

Are you a stranger in the dark?
Or are your ambitions not but lies?
Are you really who you say you are?
Or will the truth be your demise?
Are you really listening?
Or are you just using me?
Don’t lie to my face
Don’t think that I won’t see.
Are you going to stay silent?
Or will you tell me how you feel?
Are you saying what I want to hear?
Or is what you say for real?
Are you avoiding my blue-eyed gaze?
Or are you too shy to say so?
Are you ignoring me?
Or do you want our friendship to grow?
Are you a stranger in the dark?
Or are your ambitions not but lies?
Are you really who you say you are?
Or will the truth be your demise?

once upon a time there was a kid named jimmy.
he thought he was emo although clearly he wasnt.
he dated a girl named sydney when it was windy.
but the wind went away & the girl didnt stay.
so he went & lived in a chimney!

why do i worry so much?
if people like me.
they look at me and stare,
i now what their thinking their thinking
shes a moron,
everyone is prettier than me and smartey and nicer
i'm ugly mean fat stupid person

you shove me aside
shove the door in my face
screem at me to leave when i try to help you
expect everything while giving nothing
why?

To many arguments,
so many kids to see,
they run away in there minds,
but they can't go to far from reality deep in their hearts they still believe,
there inocents filled with to many worries,
little hands and little eyes pilled up with a bunch of lies,
no true home on there level they are on there own so come on adults thats your fault

I am very lonely
I wish someone could hold me
I am scared
Is there anyone that cares?
I am sitting at home
I am all alone Is there anyone to comfort me?
I am very lonely

There is a river by a wood that only is revealed
When moonlight shows her placid face, when sunlight she kills.
A woman weeps at the riverside,
Her heart is full of woe,
For she lost her one true love
So many years ago.

Her skin is stained with love, with resonating light.
Her hair grows white as pearls and shines out in the night.
She weeps into the river's tide.
Her heart is full of woe.
For she lost her one true love,
So many years ago.

She has no purpose, has no face and yet she looks at you
And tells you without words how he was never true.
She knew that his end was nigh,
Her heart is full of woe.
For she lost her own true love
So many years ago.

He came to claim her from the deep when she thought he had gone.
It never stops, it never will, her scream goes on and on.
She drifts into the river's tide,
Her heart is full of woe,
For she killed her one true love
Then died, so many years ago.